Anger Busting

Anger is an emotion common to all. Anger is a legitimate feeling with a valid cause, at least from the victim’s point of view. Aggression is an expression of anger that may seem like an automatic response, but it is controllable. Here are thoughts to gain control of yourself before anger becomes danger.

Become aware. Pay attention to your body and emotions to pre-determine when frustration is building so you can “nip it in the bud” before it becomes a full-blown outrage that is damaging to you and your family or co-workers. Keep an angry calendar; mark down every time you become frustrated. Make a list of hot topics that push your button so you can pre-determine to not engage. This will let you see how frequently you turn to negative responses.

Voice it. Give a verbal warning that you are nearing the end of your patience. This puts you in a more aware position and gives strength to not over-react. It also alerts your children or constituents to alter their behavior or to duck-and-cover.

Take a time out. Being emotions driven cause fuzzy thinking. Give yourself a five minute break so feelings can calm down and rational thinking can reconnect. Think of a past event when a positive outcome would probably have been affected had you given yourself a short time-out.

Give up the defense. Hold your position loosely - just in case you may possibly be wrong. When you change how you react, you change the way another’s actions affect you. Right or wrong, angry responses do not solve problems.

Regard self and others. Anger is destructive and is powerless to effect positive change in a relationship. Healthy regard for you holds you accountable to behaving like a mature adult. Healthy regard for others prevents aggressive behavior toward them.

Become aware. The first become aware is to determine the nearness of short-circuiting. This become aware is to congratulate yourself that you handled it well. The mind tends to think “what has happened will happen.” As you put these suggestions into practice, you will change your response. Reflect on your improved behavior and feel good about it. And be confident that the next time you will handle it even better.

Although anger prodding events may occur, allow your new anger busting skills to treat it as being an irritation. This change of view will equip you to handle it with grace and not outbursts of anger.