Financial Freedom

"Money has never made a man happy yet, nor will it. There is nothing in its nature to produce

happiness. The more a man has, the more he wants. Instead of filling a vacuum, it creates one.

If it satisfies one want, it doubles and triples that want in other ways. - Benjamin Franklin

Step up to the challenge of getting debt free and living within your means. Use wisdom in planning and in spending. Be frugal. Shop for bargains and sales. Time is currency. Are you willing to trade time with your family – which you can never get back – for time spend to get money to buy stuff. Anything worth anything takes discipline. Most Americans put spending ahead of saving, yet saving is what builds security. Spending patterns account for your future. Living within your income contributes to happiness, and living outside your income compounds misery. The number one cause of financial failure is THE INABILITY TO DELAY GRATIFICATION. The number one means of failure to delay gratification is CREDIT CARDS

“Don’t charge anything that is down the drain before you get the bill. That includes gasoline,

restaurant meals, grocery purchases, hair cuts, etc. Here’s my promise: If you will stop incurring

new unsecured debt and commit to pay every month the same minimum payments you were required to

pay this month – not paying a lower amount as your balance goes down- you will be out of debt

completely in about 36 months – that’s the average amount of time it takes. It’s really simple.”

Mary Hunt, Cheapskate News

Make a radical commitment to be content with what you have. Adjust your focus of the important. I would suggest that buying less and paying cash will help will help get back the true meaning of living. Lower your expectations and develop contentment. Want what you have.

“Wants may be easily satisfied, either by producing much or desiring little.” Marshall Sahlins

Develop a healthy respect for “Just $1.00”. Depending on your income tax bracket, you have to earn more than $1.00 to replace the $1.00. Fifteen percent bracket repays $1.41; 28% = $1.73; $31% = $1.82; 36% = $2.01; $39% = $2.16. When you spend, you are spending more than $1.00. When you save, you are saving more than $1.00. You can nickle and dime yourself into financial misery.

“Beware of little expenses. A small leak will sink a great ship.“ Ben Franklin

Challenge your spending habits. On a scale of 1-10, will you use it? How often will you use it? It is of value to you? Can you afford it? Budgeting focuses on lack and attracts spending. Focus on savings; see the challenge of getting a bargain. Let the savings feeling supersede the spending feeling. Become dignified and independent by learning to live within your income. You can do it!

“There is no dignity quite so impressive, and no independence quite so important,

as living within your means.” - Calvin Coolidge

Get in touch with your God-given creativity.

“One of the biggest things we lose by getting caught up in all this is the capacity for

imagination. People are at a loss to imagine what kind of existence they would have if

it were not for the ever-constant purchasing of new gadgets.” -Scott Moore, BU Philosophy Professor

Developing a Spending Plan

 “A budget feels like a diet. It curtails your freedom. But with a spending plan, the choices are yours.”

Deena Katz Moral

1. Determine monthly income. Income is the money you bring in on a consistent basis and includes, but is not limited to, the following: regular income from primary job(s), regular overtime, tips, public assistance, child support, pension, social security, disability, commissions, bonuses, etc. If some of the regular income is flexible, choose a smaller amount but do include it in the total.

2. Determine monthly expenses. Expenses are things you spend money on/for and includes housing (rent/mortgage), utilities, telephone, car payment(s), car repair and maintenance, gasoline and oil, insurance, medicals, groceries, eating out, clothing, snack items, doctor visits, pet supplies, etc. Include small expenditures as well as large ones.

Calculate yearly car repairs and maintenance (gas/oil/washes) and divide by twelve to arrive at the monthly expense. Do this on other items also that are not spent on a given date, such as groceries and clothing. Relegate the new school clothes purchases to a monthly expense. This way you will not be caught unawares and be in crunch time.

3. Know where your money goes. For the next two months, record all of your purchases. Record what you bought, the amount, the date and time, whether you used cash, check/debit or charge card, and your emotions at the moment.

Note the impulse buys. Become aware of emotional purchases. Buying to feel good is a temporary false fix and makes you feel worse in the long run. Think and reason before buying. Remember, stuff does not bring happiness.

4. Look at other expenses and rank them in order of importance to you. Are you spending too much on fast foods? Where are you wasting money? “Don’t worry that you’re going to lose your dignity. Engrave this motto on your mind, ‘Wherever I am, whatever I do, there is a way to do it for less’.” Mary Hunt

5. All successful spending plans require trade-offs. When you determine your core values and have something worth sacrificing for, it transcends the situation and sacrifice is not a sacrifice. “I choose to live within my budget; I will buy cool aid instead of more expensive soft drinks.” “We can rent movies rather than going to the movie house.” “I choose to live within my budget, so we can do without cable for a while.”

6. All successful spending plans require trade-offs. When you determine your core values and have something worth sacrificing for, it transcends the situation and sacrifice is not a sacrifice. “I choose to live within my budget; I will buy cool aid instead of more expensive soft drinks.” “We can rent movies rather than going to the movie house.” “I choose to live within my budget, so we can do without cable for a while.” Give up about keeping up with the neighbors. Make relationships more important than stuff.

7. Discipline yourself to paying by cash, debit card, or check. If the money is not in the bank, do not stress yourself by extending credit.

8. Limit yourself to one credit card and pay the balance each month. If you have existing credit card debt, pay off the high interest cards first, then use the extra amount to reduce the next highest, etc. This is also an excellent strategy to apply to reducing mortgage and car loans.

Here is a formula for financial success:   Income - Outgo = Zero

If you do not tell your money where to go, you will wonder where it went. Look at every penny that comes in and determine where it will go - giving, saving, living.

Saying "No" Without Guilt

“Problems cannot be solved at the same level of thinking that created them.”

Albert Einstein

Does the thought of saying “No” fill you with anxiety? That to turn down a request sets you up for guilty feelings? Do you think a “Yes” equates inclusion, importance, security, - love?

I remember distinctly learning this lesson many years ago. It has served me well ever since.

A friend in financial straits asked me to buy her stereo. Wanting to help, I obligated myself to the purchase. I failed to realize I was hurting me by obligating myself to financial stress.

I checked and double checked income verses outflow. I rationalized that although it would be difficult to pay, the melodious music would make it all worthwhile.

Reality dawned that the pain of having a huge chunk taken out of my next several paydays outweighed the pleasure of surround sound. In comparison, the stress of turning down a friend request was minimal

The decision was the hardest part.

Once the decision was made the weight lifted instantly. I could continue to live within my income. I had a new found appreciation for my radio. I could still listen to sweet music without the added expense of buying records. I felt so relieved. So non-guilty.

I said my “mea culpa” and recanted my agreement to purchase. We remained friends.

Through self-evaluation, my level of thinking had elevated to solving the problem. And a wonderful new pattern of living was set into motion. Namely:

· Life is about making choices: “Yes”; “No”; and owning up to misspeaks
· The freedom of saying “No” overrides and releases guilt
· Be judicious in making commitments; think it through first
· It is always need vs. need
· Do not be influenced by assumed obligation

A simple “No” or “No, thank you” is the most effective way to begin. It is complete, all-inclusive and leaves no room for argument.

Stress is living outside your boundaries. Rather than be suckered in with “I should” thinking, replace it with, “I could”. This small shift gives you time to evaluate before making a decision. Give yourself a little wiggle room with, “Let me check my calendar and get back with you”.

Feel good about saying “No” to things that tax your time, finances, emotional stability, commitments, family responsibilities or your over-all well being.

Frugal Living

I’ve been frugal all my life and now, thanks to the current economy, I am in style.

Apply the oil-change-lesson to everything. Pay me now or pay me later. Maintenance is a must. Get the oil changed ever 3,000 miles (or do it yourself). Rotate the tires routinely. Check and replace worn belts.

Closet cleaning and de-clutter. Break out the baking soda, vinegar and bleach to clean and disinfect most anything. They are more cost efficient than having a cleaner specifically for each area. With three products per closet, you have abundantly more space as well as more pocket change.

Use your creativity. How many new and exciting ways can you prepare hamburger meat? Create something new from old standbys. Mix and match clothes to make new outfits. Add pins or scarves for variety and newness.

Use the on-your-shelf supplies. How much food, make-up and cleaning supplies are about to expire from being shoved to the back of the shelf? Bring them to the forefront and make use of it. At the beginning of 2010 I committed to emptying our freezer and larder before restocking. Surprisingly, that decision has carried us four months with the exception of dairy products and produce.

Adopt the Shaker philosophy of “use it up, wear it out, make it do, do with out.” Allow it to become an adventure

Need vs. want. Save the sale price by refusing to buy just because it is a bargain. How many bargains currently clutter your closets and how many dollars have been dolled out for illogical emotional reasoning?

Rotate. Give a breather to clothes and shoes by allowing them to stand idle for a minimum of 24-hours between usages. The downtime makes lends to longer wear.

Learn to barter. Everyone likes to buy; no one likes to be sold. Buy on your terms, not the sellers. Make an offer whether it is an in-store product or a service. Ask, “Would you be willing to take $10.00 for this?” “I am able to pay $150.00 for the repair. Do you want the job?”

An apple a day…. Save on doctor visits by eating healthy, exercising, sleeping, washing your hands and engaging in positive thinking.

Frugal is not a dirty word. Being frugal is the best of cost-conscious living.

We welcome reprinting of articles in your newsletter or magazine, providing credit is given as follows: “This article was written by Mona Dunkin, Motivational Speaker and Personal Success Coach, www.monadunkin.blogspot.com or www.monadunkin.com.”

Synthesized Happiness

Thoughts are powerful. Philosophers throughout the centuries, including Jesus, have said in essence that “Whatever you think, you become.” In a more scientific vein, Dan Gilbert, Harvard psychologist, says we ‘synthesize’ our happiness.

Synthetics seem real and function well but are actually manmade faux materials. The mind cannot tell the difference between what is imagined and what is real. Is it the acquisition of possessions, money or adventures that makes you happy, or is it the anticipation of meaning that these things will bring? Case in point: how many times have you gained an illusive ideal, only to be reduced to the Peggy Lee song reframe of “Is that all there is?” After a short time, the event or object has no impact on your happiness.

Happiness is not found in objects. Bob - not his real name – in search of happiness and acceptance bought the latest model gigantic pick-up truck. Sure enough it brought him smiles galore as he was big man on campus. For about ten days. After everyone had admired, envied and taken a ride in his new toy, it became old news. The delight and fame was gone and so was his happiness. Reality set in of the burden of a monthly payment way over his income. A wiser Bob traded for a smaller vehicle and attached new meaning to life and possessions.

Attach on-going reality to the synthetic idea. Happiness associated with the original pursuit will be sustained as you allow accrued value. The new car retains its worth when kept up to give years of service. The home repaired and maintained increases as an asset. The marriage partner multiplies in significance through shared history and as nuances of his/her personality are appreciated.

You have it when you believe it. All things are created twice; first in the mind and then in reality. Being stuck with “synthetic happiness” is actually the key to finding authentic happiness. When there is no turning back, your mind is freed to find a way to be happy with your reality. You make the marriage work. You appreciate the parent or child. You become creative in stretching resources. You are thankful for the job you do have. You are given the gift to “Love what is”.

You are in charge of your own happiness. People contribute to but do not cause your happiness. Trying to parlay it to others is futile. They can contribute to your enjoyment of life, but you alone can make yourself happy. It is done through finding inner joy even in the midst of difficulties. Happy is better than unhappy. And the choice is yours. Always. In every situation.

“Synthetic happiness” is based on getting what you think you want. Authentic happiness is wanting what you get, whether it was your original ideal or not. With this thoughtful concept, make 2010 your happiest year yet.

We welcome reprinting of articles in your newsletter or magazine, providing credit is given as follows: “This article was written by Mona Dunkin, Motivational Speaker and Personal Success Coach, www.monadunkin.blogspot.com or www.monadunkin.com.”

Thriving on Bare Bones

AARP ran an excellent article entitled 15 Tips to Save Hundreds. Some of the replies ragged the author as not being creative; saying the tips were common sense things they have been doing for years. These tips may not be new but possibly a reframing.

Limits can be empowering. Remember the old adage, “Necessity is the mother of invention.” Allow scarcity to stimulate ingenuity and embrace challenges. Make it fun. As newlyweds on bare bones I gave myself the challenge to see how many different and creative meals I could make from ground meat.

Transcend sacrifice. Maybe life is fairer than we want to acknowledge. To thrive is to refuse to dwell on what is not a reality. This frees your creativity to non-grudgingly adopt the Shaker philosophy of “use it up, wear it out, make it do, do without”. Adjust your spirit to your forced lifestyle. When scarcity is embraced as meaningful, it transforms the current situation into having an important effect.

Remember the Holocaust. It did happen. It is a sad reality of history. Read stories of survivors and how they ate rotting potatoes, managed on discards from trash, and cooked “rock” soup. Allow it not only to inspire you but also to kick up your gratitude meter for your current situation, meager though it may be.

One plant, many potatoes. Gardening experts report that the return on dollars invested in seeds is upwards of 1 to 10. Try your hand at growing veggies in a small plot of earth, in bags of potting soil split open or in pots on the windowsill. It’s therapeutic.

If the old one still works, appreciate it. Anything that appreciates goes up in value. It is a mystery why empty houses deteriorate faster than unimproved lived-in homes. Perhaps it is the spirit of the inhabitants that has an uncanny effect on inanimate objects. I suggest that thankfulness toward the clunker would inspire you to treat it with tender loving care and thus extend its fragile life.

Adopt the homeless mentality. Prolonged life on the street lends itself to the mindset of “How little can I live on.” Even to the sever point of refusing charity. I am not suggesting that one snub the kind generosity of family and friends. Discover what really matters and see how little one needs to be content. The best things in life are free; open up and enjoy.

Surviving in difficult times is possible, although stressful. Thriving in those difficult times is a decision of the heart. When struggles are seen as meaningful the situation is transformed.

We welcome reprinting of articles in your newsletter or magazine, providing credit is given as follows: “This article was written by Mona Dunkin, Motivational Speaker and Personal Success Coach, www.monadunkin.blogspot.com or www.monadunkin.com.”

Staying Up In a Down Economy

Major unemployment, economic woes, falling stock rates, mounting foreclosures, rising gas prices – it is a current reality that brings with it the potential for despair. Without discounting the severity of the situation, how you make it through depends on your outlook. Here are suggestions to keep an upbeat attitude regardless.

Think About What You Think About. Pay attention to your thoughts and interrupt them when they turn negative, worrisome or anxious. Say “STOP” out loud, then deliberately change your mind. Turn to prayer, joys, successes, past accomplishments, future plans - anything that will keep your spirits up.

Search for the Silver Lining. Without rain the flowers would not grow. Without mountains, the valleys would be ordinary. Without the night the sun would be too much. With unlimited funds, gratitude would be jeopardized. Without financial restraints, debt becomes unbearable.

Use Your Creativity. Yes, you are creative. To thrive in a recession, adopt the mind set of “how much can I make do with what I already have.” What tasty meals can you make from the hodge-podge of staples in the pantry? How can you repurpose items in the tool shed or attic, either to use or to sell? Adopt the shaker philosophy of “Use it up. Wear it out. Make it do. Do without.”

Lighten Your Load. Few things expand your buoyancy like extra space. Look through closets, cabinets and drawers and get rid of at least ten items in each room. Donate the discards to charity to brighten another’s day. This exercise has psychological benefits in that it breaks emotional attachments to things that no longer serve you.

Be Thankful. With a heart of gratitude focus on what you do have rather than what you do not have. Do you have a roof over your head? Do you have a safe place in which to sleep? Multitudes of people world-wide do not. Do you have at least one person who cares bout you? Are you able to take care of most of your bodily needs?

Pay It Forward. The law of reciprocity really works: what you give into the lives of others is returned to you. Volunteer at a charity of your choice. Help out weekly at a soup kitchen. Commit random acts of kindness with no regard of praise. Be gentle with the infirmed and compassionate to a child.

Rest and Refresh. Make it a point to be in bed by 10 PM. It is amazing how differently the world looks after a good night’s sleep. While your body is in relax-mode, your unconscious mind is busily searching for solutions. Insurmountable problems are lessened by rest.

Perhaps the best way to stay up in a down economy is in to summons the courage of “I will try again tomorrow.” Be thankful for today and do not worry about tomorrow; stand in amazement at how things work out – in the long run - for the better.

Mona Dunkin is a Motivational Speaker, Corporate Trainer and Personal Success Coach. Read past articles at www.monadunkin.blogspot.com. Contact her at mdunkin@flash.net. -30-