Sharing Information

Communication consists of the giving and receiving of information. We decide whom we are based on how others interact with us. Although humanity seems to focus more on the negative than the positive, I suggest that is not true. In a backwards-crazy-mixed-up way, a judgment against someone is a disconnecting way of wanting that individual to live up to his own potential. 

Have I lost you yet? Stated more plainly: Criticism is an ugly way of making a request.

A child is told, "Do not touch that"; and he touches it anyway.  The study of linguistics suggests the child is not deliberately disobeying. His body reaches for what his emotions want and acts on what his mind heard which was "Touch that." Signals received/sent become our perception that in turn becomes our reality - only it may not be real. 

No wonder we are so complicated. No wonder life is so wonderful (full of wonder).

Watch out for the “boomerang effect”.  Information given may ricochet on you and the one to whom you gripped thinks less of you.  She sees you as being petty. Even if you put on a good act, the gossip (and that’s what it is) shows your true colors.

 

Be compassionate.  All are broken and all have faults. What are your struggles? Be careful lest you attempt to make another measure up to your standards. It’s more about you than him. 

 

Adopt a balcony perspective; step back and really see.  Take yourself out of the middle and allow the conversation to be different. This stance motivates to self-discovery and leads to responding rather than reacting. You shift from authority to stakeholder. 

 

Even when you think you have something constructive to say, make strides to remain silent. It can be difficult to simply be an observer when you interact with those who are not living as we think they should. Hurt, anger and condemnation are a natural response; certainly not open-hearted acceptance. If your comments are met with silence, graciously accept their response as a “do not interfere” position.

 

Speak truth only when done so in love. Real love.  Truth teaches with respect and kindness. Always choose high regard. Being obsessed with others and their problems keeps one a safe distance from working on his own issues.

Please let me hear from you.