Improved Relationships

“But I’m doing the best I can.”

I’ve been tempted to use that excuse myself. Only my self-awareness, social understanding and spiritual consciousness prod me until I do some self-evaluation. Asking and answering defines the problem and seeks solution.

Look at your own history. Do you have a string of rocky/broken relationships, unsatisfactory jobs, contention with authority, stressful living and overall lack of happiness and success? Do not joust at windmills trying to fix everyone else. Look at the common denominator – you.

Pointing out a problem is not enough. Look for your underlying motive through reflection and find solutions through trial and error. The path includes honest thought, sincere planning, decision-making, willingness to sacrifice and unassuming action.

Questioning your hidden agenda is a good place to start. There is faith in honest doubt. Will you meet your need to belong by following the crowd or by being true to your authentic self? Listen and heed the still small voice inside. And you must become quiet to hear it.

Conscious is an inward knowing of right from wrong with a compulsion to do what is right. One’s faithful life purpose always includes doing what is best for you and, by default, is also best for others. We are all connected and our lives enter-twine.

Be responsible for your thoughts and your actions. Placing blame on someone puts the situation outside yourself and causes one to think and act like you have to fix him/her. When you identify your part of the problem and take responsibility for you – your thoughts, your attitude and your actions – you have something you can work with.

That is not to say that you work independently. I/we messed this us. I/we are each responsible to some degree. I/we need course correction. The thing is, the only one whom you have control over is the “I” portion, not the “we” factor(s). To take personal responsibility results in immediate empowerment. You have found the one and only locus of your control.

It is always need verses need. Once you make the decision to quit blaming and to take responsibility for your part, the atmosphere mysteriously softens and the seeming opponent is placed in a more comfortable position to follow your lead. Or at least to hear your input.

The greatest threat to taking charge of your own life is comparing yourself with others and deeming self as having fallen short. This leads to following the crowd and participating in group-think. It becomes a self-depreciating way that leads to stagnation and conflict (with you more than them).

Understand the necessity of self-imposed limits. I define responsibility as “having ability to determine how to respond”. It is through discipline that we move from dissatisfaction to hopeful. Placing limits leads to fulfillment.

Don’t Cope, Overcome: Flourish and overcome by really doing the best you can. Think it through, make a choice, act upon your decision and relish the feel good results. Your life is a gift worth receiving (or taking back).

For counsel or speaking engagements, contact Mona at mona@solutionprinciples.com 254-749-6594